We Are Experiencing Technical Difficulties
by Yanan
Summary: Due to an explosion, the Heroes conversations are broadcast instead of the regularly scheduled commentary. For the Kink Meme.


A/N: Wrote this at the same time as Missed Opportunity for the Kink Meme, so neither are all that great. I struggle terribly with dialog.

Disclaimer: I do not own Tiger & Bunny.

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><p>We are Experiencing Technical Difficulties <p>

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><p>The blast from the explosion shook the broadcasting van hard enough that Agnes actually feared for their video stream. The entire van was tilted and in all probability hanging a good portion off the bridge they'd been in the middle of just moments before. Mary was on the verge on hysteria, grabbing at the controls in front of her as the van swayed while Cain gripped his seat from the floor, bleeding from a cut from somewhere in his hair. Agnes counted herself both lucky and unlucky. She was lucky she wasn't injured save for a broken nail, but her four hundred dollar pumps hadn't faired so well.<p>

"Wow," Dragon Kid gulped. "That was really big."

"Sorry! And sorry again!" Sky High's voice boomed in a sheepish way. "But I caught the criminals!"

"Well that worked brilliantly," Barnaby's snide voice floated through the silence where Mario usually made some exciting comment for the audience.

Wait... What?

"So Bunny…"

"I swear. If you do not stop calling me that I'm goin—"

"Nag, nag, nag. 'That's not my name!' You are so not cute."

Where was Mario's commentary?

"What do you think you're doing, old man!"

Eyes wide, Agnes stared at the screens aghast, where Wild Tiger had his hands on the top of his helmet, imitating ears while Barnaby glared at him, arms crossed.

"Tsun tsun tsun!" And there was Origami Cyclone peeking out from behind a car just a few feet away.

Tiger choked.

"What does that even mean?" Barnaby demanded.

"It's part of the Japanese term 'tsundere'," Rock Bison stated, making his way across the bridge.

"Oh really?" Barnaby deadpanned.

"Tiger's wife was one."

And Tiger tripped. "I- Can we stop talking about this? Please!"

"She had glasses too..."

"Glasses? Maybe..." Blue Rose muttered.

"I'm not buying you drinks tonight," Tiger pouted.

Bison flailed, dropping the car he was attempting to push out of the way. "Oh come on!"

Sky High landed on top of said car, the two bombers in his hands. "I like drinks! Can I have drinks? Can I come?" God, he sounded like an overeager puppy.

"Are any of you actually going to help us with these cars?" Blue Rose screeched, just barely managing to keep a car from slipping off the damaged bridge with a wall of ice.

"We don't need those silly boys!" Fire Emblem stated, flipping his cape over his shoulder and placing a hand on one hip. He was melting some of the twisted debris together to form a sort of railing. "Girl power all the way!"

"That doesn't make any sense!" Blue Rose snapped.

"I'm sorry! I've been trying to be more girly!" Dragon Kid wilted slightly.

Blue Rose only made a strangled noise.

The van shifted. Mary whimpered. Cain turned slightly green.

"Will one of you idiots save us!" Agnes snapped.

"Oh right. Oops." There was Bison.

"On it. We get points for this, right?" And Barnaby.

"Can we just toss all these cars out of the way? No one's in them." Tiger...

"Once I let the authorities handle these two I will return immediately! I will be back as soon as I can! Thanks for your patience with the capture! And thanks again!" And there went Sky High, sounding far more happy and excited than anyone had any right to be.

"You can't just destroy all these cars, old man! It makes our sponsors look bad! Not to mention all the fees for damages," Barnaby sounded frustrated as he jumped over several cars. Tiger paused.

"But..."

"I'm not going to court with you again!"

"Bunn-yyyy!" That had to be one of the most pitiful whines she'd ever heard from the man.

Agnes growled, looking up at the screens ready to let a scathing comment about how they should just shut up and do their jobs and save them so they could get Mario's mic up and running and froze. The ratings... They were... Jumping? Barnaby and Tiger were bickering like an old married couple as they made their way down the bridge, Fire Emblem was making suggestive comments to Bison who was sputtering. Blue Rose was muttering about how heels weren't quite cut out for what they were doing as she stumbled over a piece of rubble and Dragon Kid was following around the other 'girls' throwing in her two cents every once in a short while. Sky High was being... Sky High. He'd nabbed Origami after the younger blond had shoved a civilian out of the way as a piece of the bridge crumbled beneath them. He was stuttering in an embarrassed mix of English, Japanese and Russian as he clung to the older man.

She scrambled at the keyboard, pulling up the HeroTV forums as fast as she could. Why were they taking so long to pull up!

"Mr. Wild! When this is over can I have some of your trading cards?"

Agnes stopped, turned back to the screens and gaped at the image of Sky High carefully depositing Origami onto more stable pavement. What?

Tiger tripped, accidentally throwing a car off the bridge. Apollon Media was not going to be pleased about that.

"What!"

Several heroes turned to stare at the man surreptitiously, the act of looking like they were focused on the task before them perfected through multiple situations similar to this. No one watching the live broadcast would have noticed... If they weren't hearing what was being said.

Sky High continued, oblivious as always. "My superiors found all of mine!" He chirped. "They said it was inappropriate to have paraphernalia of other heroes and made me throw them away." Agnes could hear the kicked puppy look even as he zoomed around as if nothing was wrong. "Even the rookie card you signed for me the first year you became a hero!"

Poseidon Line was going to have a riot on their hands after that sunk in.

"Y-You had my rookie card?"

"I was fifteen! It was my birthday!"

Tiger's head fell. "I'm so old."

Barnaby snorted.

A full-blown riot. There was already a post about it on the- The Forums!

Agnes breath caught. Her eyes dilated. The posts. The fans! They were loving this. She suddenly wished she had a place to excuse herself too and that she'd worn a different pair of underwear. If this is what happened when they had malfunctions due to explosions in the immediate vicinity, they may have to have more technical difficulties in the very near future. 

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><p>AN: Please let me know what you think or how to improve!


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